Suffocate

With every look from your eyes and every word that your speak. I feel like I am suffocating. You know the air that you can't see yourself being without for a moment. Something is shifting inside of me. The more we connect, the more we talk, the more we come closer. I find myself seeking you in the pitch black darkness. I feel like "Is this too soon?" Then, Im like this is the force of nature. Its something that we share together. I am going to need more than just a weekend. I am going to need a planned trip.

The magnitude in this small period. I am going slow as I can. I can still hear his words inside my mind. I sware he is more sadistic then he is telling me. I felt it. He didn't rest, no slumber until I suffered. I was being a limit tester by mentioning my wicked emotional masochistic thoughts of crying while sucking his dick." I didn't think that he would pay that no mind. He was not tripping about the dick sucking...Its was the "crying" that captured him. Only an emotional sadist would take heed of that statement. In which that statement made him suffer....

So, I suffered for his pleasure. The pressure of his body that had an ache that I was not there to aid to that need.
I will try to be careful next time...

Im suffocating right now, I have to learn and earn him. I have to earn to visit him in due time. I am strong even in my weakness. Its my pleasure to serve, with truth and honesty. I need to serve.

I guess acknowledging the fact of what I need is compelling...or expression my air being taken bit by bit..

suffocating.