Unlock....me.

The beauty about being unlocked is being free. Its important for someone to know all of me. Especially within a D/s situation. The thing is can you unlock me and not judge me? Could you unlock my soul and still hold me together when the times get rough?  Ive been alone single since 2004. After that? I have been wandering, trying to find myself as woman. I didn't have an identity. I had a few random sexual experiences that left me unsatisfied. I couldn't even connect to a man, hell I didn't even now what one really feel like. You see more I realized how much I needed to love myself. I kept myself in this cycle of being scared of men but liking the wrong men. Ive been on this self love Sire for five years now.

Now, I am in love with myself. It became easier to be alone and learn who or what I felt I was as a woman. You see, I wasn't raised in an emotional environment both of my parents were not emotionally available. I had a deep hole to fill with God. Seriously, I am not a reckless woman not my any means and it was by the grace of God that life didn't tackle me so hard. I still had this strong discipline within me. I had that streak of strength that made me work hard mentally to make wise choices.
Then, I discovered that I had this longing and that is what brought me to the lifestyle. I had a desire to have a man stronger than myself and like a Father to me. Yep, a Daddy. I craved a strength,a protection, a safety net. Even with all of my independence I still needed--a man to suffocate me emotionally, mentally, spiritually and physically with Dominance.

I need my soul opened examined and some surgery to the parts that I can't sew back together like the longing the need for a man, a Dominant black man.